DOWN & DIRTY ASC

Friends!

Are you tired of those sissy-ass "friendship" poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality?

Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship:

1. When you are sad -- I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.

2. When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.

3. When you smile -- I will know you finally got some.

4. When you are scared -- I will rag on you about it every chance I get.

5. When you are worried -- I will tell you horrib stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining.
6. When you are confused -- I will use little words.

7. When you are sick -- Stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have.
8. When you fall -- I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.

9. This is my oath..... I pledge it to the end.

"Why?" you may ask; "because you are my friend".

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